Vegeta's first day of church!
by Golden Mooncat
Summary: Vegeta is being dragged to church, will he behave?Or will Bulma be driven insane by him and Trunks? R&R to find out!
1. Bulma drags Vegeta to Church, or no cook...

"WOMAN!!!" Vegeta yelled at the top of his lungs.  
"IN A MINUTE VEGETA!" Bulma yelled back as she muttered all the ways of torturing him she   
could do that day.  
The day was Sunday and Bulma was making the family go to church, despite Vegeta's protests.   
Bulma was busy helping little Trunks put on his tie and Vegeta was complaining about the outfit   
he was being forced to wear, most likely, for the 600th time that morning. Bulma finished Trunks'   
tie and went into her and Vegeta's room to see what he wanted.  
"What now, Vegeta?!" Bulma asked, her temper short thanks to his nagging.  
Vegeta whipped around and ripped the tie he WAS supposed to have been putting on in two. He   
smirked and waited for a response, which was a fist in the gut. Vegeta wasn't affected by it but   
he did growl at Bulma.  
"Why in the hell are you being so pig headed about going to church, Vegeta?!" Bulma asked as   
she pulled out a new tie helping him put it on.  
"Saiyins DON'T go to church! I should be staying home and training, and beating some sence   
into the brat!" he said.  
Vegeta's reaction from Bulma was her cutting off his air with the tie.  
"YOU are going to church! You will sit there and be silent! You will NOT call your son brat   
and you will BE-HAVE! Understand?!" she yelled as Vegeta turned purple.  
Vegeta nodded and breathed in a sigh of relief as she released the tie. He muttered some   
lovely profanties in Saiyin under his breath, which got him a death glare from Bulma.  
Little Trunks came into the room to see what was being said and laughed when he saw his   
father madder than ever. He went over to Bulma and tugged on her skirt a bit.  
"Mommy? Was Daddy being a bwastard again??" he asked when she looked down at him.  
"Yes he was honey, now don't use that word again." Bulma said.  
"What word, Mommy?"  
"No, not that word dear."  
"Was?"  
"No"  
"Daddy?"  
"No, honey."  
"Being?"  
"No, Trunks."  
"A?"  
"NO!"  
"Again?"  
"NO! Now don't you say it!"  
"Don't say what? Bwastard?"  
"YES DON'T SAY BWASTARD!!!!"  
Vegeta laughed and got another death glare from Bulma.  
"Well, VEGETA! Did YOU teach our son THAT word?!"  
"NO! If any one taught the brat that word it was YOU!"  
Bulma and Vegeta get in a fight over whom taught Trunks "that word" and Trunks goes and   
brushes his teeth.   
Bulma and Vegeta finish arguing over "that word" and Vegeta is forced into the car. Trunks   
sits in the back seat smiling ear to ear, having a laughing fit about the "no 'cookies' for a week   
if you don't shut the hell up and get in the car Vegeta!" that Bulma used to get him in the car. 


	2. On the way to church, what music to list...

As they were in the car, Vegeta turned on some LOUD rock music. Bulma leaned over the   
steering wheel and turned the radio to gospel music. Vegeta growled and changed it back to rock.   
Bulma gave him a death glare and switched it back to gospel. This went on for a total of 10   
minutes, until Bulma pulled the car over.  
Vegeta shut off the radio when Bulma said, "If you don't leave the radio alone, your being   
tied to the roof of the car!!!"  
"YOU will NOT do that, and you know it, Woman!" Vegeta yelled.  
Bulma leaned over and pulled out the bungy cords she used to tie him to the roof of the   
car the last time he was being pig headed, and Vegeta shuddered at the memories of the bugs that   
kept flying into his mouth, all because he wouldn't stop complaining and shut up.  
Trunks was in the back seat laughing as Bulma pulled the car back into the lane and started   
for the church again, 15 minutes of arguing later.  
"Mommy? Can you turn on some Linkin Park? Please?" he asked.  
"No honey, not today."  
"Why?"  
"Because we are not pulling up into a church with head banger music going full blast. Ok?"  
"No, why can't we listen to Linkin Park?"  
"I just told you why honey." Bulma said her temper growing thinner with each question.  
"I wanna listen to Linkin Park!"  
*Snap* went Bulma's temper.  
"WE ARE NOT LISTENING TO LINKIN PARK TODAY TRUNKS! NOW SHUT THE HELL UP AND QUIT ASKING!!"  
Trunks' lower lip quivered and Vegeta turned around and said, "If you cry I am tying YOU on   
the roof of this car! So stop sniffling and act like a TRUE saiyin warrior!"  
Trunks burst out crying thanks to Vegeta and Bulma started smacking Vegeta over the head   
with the bible she had beside her. Vegeta grabbed the book and threw it into the back seat by the   
crying Trunks.   
"NOW look what you did Vegeta! You made Trunks cry by looking at him with your ugly face!   
Just like when he was a baby!" Bulma yelled.  
"WELL! Maybe if he didn't act like one I wouldn't treat him like one!" Vegeta yelled back.  
Meanwhile in the backseat of the car Trunks had stopped crying and was now laughing at his   
parents arguing. The arguing lasted until they pulled up to the church where Bulma parked the car   
and got out. She went around and helped Trunks out of the car and dusted him off and grabbed her   
bible.   
Bulma had to practically pull Vegeta out of the car and as they were walking into the   
church Vegeta was muttering alot of lovely profanities under his breath in saiyin. 


	3. What happens when Vegeta drinks too much...

When Trunks, Bulma, and Vegeta took their seats in the church pews the minister came over and   
started talking to Bulma.  
"Bulma Briefs? Is that you?" the minister asked.  
"Yes, that is me. Who is ask-wait a second is that you Kyle Pants?"  
"That is me. Well look at you, still as beautiful as ever, you don't look like the woman   
I thought you might look like when we graduated. So, hows life been treating you?"  
"Good, good. I am married," she said pointing to Vegeta, "and that is my son Trunks." she   
said pointing to Trunks who sat up straight like his father.  
Vegeta wasn't happy about Bulma's knowing of the minister, and the obvious thing they had   
had when they had been in high school. He was very much tempted to ki blast this minister when   
he had to go up and do the prayers.  
After the prayers were done and it was time to drink the wine, aka blood of Jesus, and eat   
the bread, aka flesh of Jesus, Vegeta was ready to go home. But then he had to go up and do what   
everyone else had done, and tasted of Jesus. Well he went up there, and he ate the bread, he also   
drank the wine, but there was one itsy bitsy problem, HE DRANK ALL THE WINE!  
Not a drop was left when Father Kyle got over to stop him.  
"How dare you drink all of Jesus' blood! What do you think He would think of you for doing   
such?! Why your wife is embaressed by you! I think that you should leave, and save your wife   
from such horror of YOU as a husband-" he started and was stopped by a punch in the mouth by Vegeta.  
Now we all know when a saiyin hits you, they make it count, so when Father Kyle was punched   
he flew backwards and was flung out of the window.  
"That is for hitting on my wife and telling me what to do. Come on woman, brat, we're going   
home!" Vegeta said with a drunks slur, for he had never been drunk before.  
Bulma stood up, in shock at what had happened, and followed Vegeta out of the church. Trunks   
was right behind Bulma and was laughing quietly.  
When they got in the car Bulma had regained her composure and gave Vegeta an earfull, which   
didn't help with Vegeta's headache from drinking all the wine so fast. Needless to say he was sick   
the next day and didn't get any 'cookies' for a month and a half. Also the Breifs family didn't go   
to church ever again all thanks to Vegeta, but Vegeta thought that he had done some good.  
He had put a guy whom had been hitting on his wife in the hospital(he planned on doing more   
to the guy sometime later), taught his son how to handle people, and gotten out of having not to   
go to church ever again. So all in all in his book he did the best thing possible for his family! 


	4. Oh no!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Author's Note~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Ok I didn't want to offend anyone with my story, I just thought it   
would be funny if Bulma made Vegeta go to church, I wasn't trying to offend any religion. I also   
wasn't trying to offend anyone in particular, it is just I went to church the day I wrote this   
and the idea just kinda popped into my head, so if I seriously offended anyone, I am sorry.~*~*~  
  
  
  
  
~*~Thanks for listening~*~  
~*~ Golden Mooncat~*~ 


End file.
